Lying To Tell The Truth

Scott P. Phillips from Weakness With A Twist tagged me. He pressed me to participate in a meme. I’ve put it off long enough…here it is…

The meme works like this: I list five things about me. Four are untrue; one true. All are outlandish, implausible, or ridiculous enough that no one will be inclined to believe any of the listings are true. (Or…that’s how it’s supposed to go…) Plus, You, Dear Reader, are supposed to plead for me to reveal the truth(s) and the lie(s); nevertheless, despite the pleas from You, I’m supposed to never divulge which could be True and might be False. Then I tag five other people, four who will likely participate and one person who might not.

Meme Me

When I lived on the Great Plains, where the wind howled and almost blew over my 10′ trailer home that I staked it into the earth with those big-screw pet stakes, I ate a lot of fried liver.
When the Crazy Cat Lady who sometimes howled all night almost fell into a well, and then she kept trying to jump into the well, I used Dim-Mak to help her into the next world. (Who wants a Crazy Cat Lady in your well?)
During my 4 month sojourn in the North Woods of Minnesota, I’d often wander the Old Bog. The Old Bog contained knee-deep, ice-cold water, even in the heated heart of summer, and I when I’d wander among the giant shrubs, I’d fear the Bear. One day, right before they sauntered down the outhouse trail, she and her cub sat in front of my big cabin window. That’s where I first learned Bear Palm Baguazhang.
I reversed the meme because, while I find sarcasm painfully delightful, I cannot lie well. So all these listings are mostly true except one…one’s mostly false…that reminds of a riddle. After you die and you’re on your way to Heaven, you arrive at two-tyned fork in the road, facing a two-headed angel…right then you know, deep-down in your heating heart that—one head always lies and the other always tells the truth. What do you ask the two-headed talking angel, who always tells one total truth and one total lie, to discover which tyne goes to Heaven (or Hell if you prefer Hell…)? You only get 1 question…What do you ask to find your way?
When I was younger I practiced Karate and would often meet Yang Chen Fu in dreams. The towering fat man sauntered slowly toward me where I’d punch him in the belly and he’d laugh in my face. He’d continue to saunter and laugh, until I woke, bathed in sweat, wondering how to punch. Later, when I slept through dark, starry nights in the High Deserts of Utah, Yang Chen Fu and I would practice form, right down to the little breath details; after I got that, he sent me to train with his Grandpa.

Well that was fun. I hope you enjoyed it too.

Hey…

Francisco at Tai Chi Musings
Jonathan at Illuminated Mind
John at Camp Tai Chi
Neal at Urban Samurai
Wujimon

Try on the meme: Write five outlandish, crazy bits about you, making sure that one’s true, four lie. Never tell your readers which is which. Then pass it on to 5 folks; 1 you think won’t play, 4 who probably will. Get it?

I wonder which of you will play?

Dear Reader: please check out their websites and blogs.

And thanks to Mr. Phillips for the Weak and Twisted meme.